Random Events!
by FusionRose
Summary: Beatrix gangsta wannabe, Vivi caffine addict, Dagger mental patient, Zidane superhero, Amarnt thinks he is a woman and Freya, umm i don't know what she is! WARNING RANDOM
1. CHRISTMAS!

**Random Events**

**Emzies**: And today I feel like being cruel…O SO CRUEL! Fear the cruelness

**Mat and Mog:** (--);

**Disclaimer**: do not own ff9 so there!

**Claimer:** (eating a flower) mmmmm

**Chapter 1: Christmas is so evil!**

**XxXxXxXxXxX**

"Silent night, Holy night, all is calm, all is bri…"

"WILL YOU SHUT THE HELL UP!" Zidane screamed from inside the hideout! He was with the rest of Tantalus plus Vivi and Carol singers decided to knock at their door. When Baku shut the door in their face, they decided to sing extremely loud.

"Away in a manger, Where …" Baku then chucked a watermelon out the window and it landed on the tallest man's head.

"Gwahahahahahaha, Right in the head." The older man and Marcus gave a high five before the youngest girl in the group shouted at them

"You shall pay, we will tell our master."

"You really did it now Baku!" Zidane gasped.

"Your Christmas shall now be a living nightmare." The girl continued before they vanished into a puff of smoke. Vivi looked confused.

"Baku, where did that water-melon come from?" The black mage asked.

"Why, in this closet!" He stated opening the door to find all the water-melons gone. "Noooo my precious water-melons!" Zidane quickly vanished into his room and came out with a mask and underwear on his head.

"This looks like a job only Monkey boy can do!" The genome proclaimed sticking his fist in the air. Vivi sighed he then looked over to see a cup of coffee making his eyes grow extremely wide.

"COFFEE!" He screamed running over to it and drinking the hot liquid.

"Don't worry sir! Me and My trusty side-kick Vivi will find out about your missing Water-Melons, let us go to Alexandria!" Zidane saluted and jumped out of the window following shortly with a whiny voice squeak 'I'm okay'.

Meanwhile …

"They're everywhere, looking at me!" Dagger shrieked referring to the blobs of snow in the form of a man (Snowmen-DUH!). "They're evil, burn them BURN THEM ALL!"

"Brudda, we burned them all, Init!" Beatrix said in her sleazy way. Beatrix Steiner had on a cap back to front and dark shades covering her eyes (There was no eye patch)

"Are you sure! ARE YOU POSSITIVE!" The young queen screamed shaking Beatrix. "How can you be sure Beatrix?"

"Hey hey hey, none of this Beatrix stuff call me Stein-Trix!" Dagger kept a blank expression on her face, making Beatrix walk away back wards slowly. Steiner then burst into the door.

"It's TERRIBLE!" He screamed like a girl

"What, More snowmen" Dagger worriedly asked.

"NO, MY TEDDYS GONE!"

"No not…"

"YES, BOBO THE BEDTIME BEAR IS MISSING!"

"I know who it is!" Dagger screamed running to the corner with shifty eyes. "It was the Snowmen!" Steiner just ignored her and continued.

"AND IT'S CHRISTMAS TOMORROW! How will I get to sleep now?" He wept.

"Lighten up Brudda, You still have Mr Snuggles!" Beatrix explained causing a smile on his lips. "Respect"

"Respect!" Steiner replied banging his fists with hers. At that moment Eiko walked in. Dagger started to hallucinate, she saw Eiko as another snowman.

"Ahhhhhh get it out get it out!"

"Really My liege it is only a purple piece of cheese!" Steiner reasoned.

"Really Steiner that is no way to treat a lady! Anyway Dagger may I ask you a question."

"Whose Dagger?"

"Okay then, Is Santa Evil?"

"Well my Purple piece of cheese friend." Dagger stared scratching her chin. "It depends, if this 'Santa' you speak of likes Snowmen."

"Yeah he does."

"BURN HIM, LET HIM PLUNGE IN HELL! MAKE HIM SUFFER WITH THE BURNING PEOPLE AND FORCE THEM TO LICK PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF ODIN'S …."

"Your majesty!" Steiner screamed bringing Dagger back to her senses. "Don't worry cheesy, Santa is good, why ever would you think he is bad?"

"Because 'he sees you when your sleeping, he knows when your awake' isn't that just a LITTLE disturbing or am I imagining it?" They had a minute of silence.

"Whom did you hear this from?" Steiner asked.

"People are singing outside!" Eiko explained with shifty eyes. "They're scaring me!"

Meanwhile down the corridor…

Amarant was spinning in a pink tutu singing 'I'm pretty' from west side story when Freya suddenly came out of nowhere.

"Freya, Darling what's the matter?" The red haired man asked in a girly voice. Freya remained quiet. "Freya?"

"The fairy tells me to burn things!" Amarant suddenly screamed and ran down the corridor and into the front hall where he bumped into Zidane and Vivi. Freya then continued down the hall the opposite way singing like a spastic. "Blah ka ma ya da ge yia pa ra , Now Burn to music!" While with Zidane…

"Look Vivi… Mr pinkie by by!" Zidane said referring to Amarant while pointing his fist in the air. Vivi just stayed Quiet staring at Amarant who was getting extremely scared…again. "Tell us Mr pinkie by by where I may find the Nice lady."

"Oh, Darling do you mean Dagger."

"Whose this Dagger you speak of?"

"Garnet, Dagger, Sarah, was-princess, Now-Queen…" Zidane scratched the back of his head. Amarant sighed. "The girl you always make love too."

"Oh yes, that is who I am talking about,"

"Well she's in the throne room darling!"

"Thank you Mr pinkie by by!" Zidane saluted and ran to the throne room with Vivi wobbling behind.

With the author…

"Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha" A young girl cackled staring at her computer screen and typing words on with her Keypad. "First, Final Fantasy 9, but I want stop there, no, I'll destroy 7 then 8 and then 10, and who knows maybe even 12, mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!"

Anyway back with Zidane who is now in the throne room…

"Are you Santa?" Dagger asked the newcomer.

"No it's me Monkey Man!" Zidane once again does the strange stance. "Respect Stein-Trix!" He added noticing the gangster-wannabe.

"Respect!" They banged fists together. "So who has you been Brudda!"

"Brudda? Brudda? I am not your Brudda! Just your neighbouring Monkey Man wanting a bit of publicity!" Zidane once AGAIN did the stance. "And we are on a mission? Have any of you seen the disappearing Water-Melons?"

"Water Melons" –Dagger

"Water Melons?" – Steiner

"Da Water Melons?" – Beatrix

"Water Melons?" –Eiko

"W-Water Melons?" – Zidane (Don't ask)

"WATER MELONS!" –Cloud

"Huh?" –Everyone except for Cloud. He then disappears into a puff of smoke.

"Random!" Vivi said making everyone stare at him. "Anyway, Have any of you seen the water melons?"

"Water Melons?" Zidane asked receiving a glare form the young Mage.

"No, I'm sorry Monkey Man and Pointy Hat boy but we have seen none of these Water Melons." Dagger stated.

"Maybe you need a better mirror then." Zidane said in trance staring at Dagger's umm…. cough. Dagger giggled. Vivi sighed.

"Well." The young black mage started. "It is time for us to go then." He then tried to open the door but it wouldn't. He tried a bit harder, still it wouldn't budge. "WE'RE TRAPPED!"

"YAY!" Screamed Dagger the only person who was not freaked out. "No more Snow-men can get me. Now if you excuse me." Dagger suddenly did a headstand, put her toes in her ears and waved her fingers around.

"Monkey Man reckons that looks like Fun." Zidane told the queen once again doing his gay stance before doing the same as Dagger they then stared to sing in unison.

"_I feel pretty, oh so Pretty, I feel pretty and Witty and Gay! Oh so pretty.." _They continued. Later on the group was getting bored. Dagger and Zidane had stopped and decided to poke each other instead.

"Poke!" Dagger said spastically while poking Zidane in the shoulder.

"Ow that hurt! I'm going to tell my Sister of you!" Zidane cried.

"How boring." Vivi sighed. "I wished I had coffee." Just the thought of coffee brought a smile to Vivi's lips and made him look incredibly scary once again. Randomly Freya burst through the wall and rolled onto the ground. She dusted her self of, opened the door (Turned the knob the other way round unlike Vivi) and walked outside into the corridor. The rest of the group hadn't noticed this and continued to do there on things. Then suddenly Kuja crashed the door open and walked in but stopped ad frowned.

"This isn't Pink fluffies 4 u!" He sighed and walked back out. Zidane and the rest ran through the doors and kissed the floor outside.

"mmmmmm, that was tasty, I wonder what it was?" Steiner wondered looking at the wet patch on the floor where he had kissed He shrugged and continued to kiss it. Eiko was doing the same only on a dry piece.

"Wonderful, Wonderful Freedom!" The purple girl shrieked. The group stopped and looked at each other.

"I'm scared, Let's go back into the throne room." Dagger admitted after not even a minute being out of the room. So they walked back into the throne room.

Meanwhile somewhere else…

"Here you are master!" the cloaked figures gave their purple master the water-melons. These cloaked figures were none other than the carol-singers. And there master was…was…was…was…

Anyway… meanwhile somewhere else…

"So what is the matter Timmy?"

"I keep pee-ing myself, once I even did it just outside the throne room, but didn't tell anyone."

"That's okay Billy, as long as no-one knows."

"My name is Timmy."

"I know it is Bob, it disturbs us all!" Timmy raised an eye-brow to the doctor.

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E**mzies**: (--); I don't know if I should continue this! If I do my next even will be Easter.

**Mog:** Please R & R, or we will not continue this fic!


	2. VALENTINES DAY!

**Emzies:** Okay I decided to do A valentines day one….  
**Mog**: THANKYOU EVERYONE THAT REVIEWED!  
-  
Replies:  
**RefugeOfSouls:** Lol r u okay, U seem to be laughing a lot lol… 

**Edonil:** Heres your update

**GemEncrustedEarth:** Actually Im not feeling alright ive had to much pepsi and blue…

**SilverAngel03:** Hello my friend –Hugz Angel- Thank you for reviewing

**Red eyed Stranger:** Alright mat! Ur my best friend thankyou for reviewing

-

**Mat:** Your welcome…

**Emzies**: How did u get here

**Mat:** Im always here..

Anyway…-

**Dark Ranger28:** I love that smilie XD It makes me laugh :p Anyway.. Thx 4 reviewing..

**LancerZero:** I LOVE RANDOMNESS AS WELL, PEOPLE SAY IM VERY RANDOM, what would the world be like without randomness, boring that's what..

**Samy-Chan: **-Blows Nose- Thankyou that's very sweet I think there should be more people like me 2….. Or not, then the world would go soooooo crazy….. Like I care tho, I love craziness, Im one of your fav reviewers? Thankyou I loved ur story…

**DreamCherry:** AHHHH WAKKA, Hes soooooooo gay…. What he is ya? Ahhhhhhhhhhh im turning into him –Wacs head with her cat- Phew… THX FOR VISITING MY WEBSITE!

**Hippo-Lover:** Im sure your laugh isn't idiotic and you have a very good point about It makes the world so less dull and boring, lol.

**Vixen Black:** You poor thing, Here you go –PHEONIX DOWN- Better?

-

**Mog:** now that's gone, ON WITH THE STORY!

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Valentines Day…

"PINK RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!" Blank screamed bashing into Zidane.

"Whats da matter ketchup head?" (My friend's –Chibi-Yuki-San- Name for Blank) The genome asked really concerned.

"ITS VALENTINES DAY!"

"………….. Whats Valentines day?" Zidane asked quite confused.

"A stupid holiday that Is held on earth. Remember when we were kids and we got a love letters and chocolates and they turned out to be from Baku so we thought we had secret admirers?" Blank explained.

"You mean they weren't from Barbie" Zidane whispered on the verge of tears. Blank shook his head. Marcus then Popped out of nowhere and ran up to the two friends.

"Valentines day wont be Sh!t this year!" Zidane and Blank then looked Confused.

"Marcus," Zidane began "Why is it that when u said shit a exclamation mark appeared instead of the i?" Marcus sweat dropped but then continued.

"Anyway, There's gonna be a beauty contest in Alexandria.." Zidane looked extremely Happy and do did Blank." So the Trio plus Vivi Walked towards Alexandria.

Meanwhile with Beatrix…-Cough- I mean Stein-Trix….

"Yo brudda sign up for dis ere Fasioney Show mabob and get a free gangsta car… Its heavy mon' in it!" People were STILL ignoring her. "Sign up or ill bust a cap in yer ass." Now everyone signed in, even the men…. Steiner however was not having luck with his store.

"Pweaze Try and guess the name of the bear anyone?" A little boy came up to Steiner.

"What do I win?" The little boy asked him shyly.

"Well the joy of getting it right of coarse, I win the bear…" Steiner replied before the boy ran of to his mother. Steiner sighed.

-MEANWHILE IN THE CASTLE…

"What the hell GET IT AWAY GET IT AWAY!" Dagger screamed to her servants.

"But its cupid…"

"Cupid is evil I tell ya EVIL!" She continued before smashing her head through the wall. The servants looked at their queen strangely. "…ow…"

"DAGGER!" A little girl screamed out.

"Who the hell are you?" Dagger asked rudely after taking her head out the wall.

"It's me, Eiko…" Dagger looked at her strangely.

"Your purple piece of cheese friend…" Dagger still looked at her strangely. Suddenly Steiner appeared.

"Your majesty do not worry, its only Fluffy the lovable fire breathing bunny rabbit." He smirked proud with himself. Eiko sighed and Dagger smiled finally knowing who this stranger was.

"Anyway Dagger…"

"Who's Dagger…?"

"You are Dagger…"

"I'm a dagger!"

"DAGGER!"

"WHERE WHERE AHHH SOMEONE IS TRYING TO ATTACK THE QUEEN WITH A DAGGER!" Garnet/Dagger/Sarah screamed making all the guards, servants and mostly Steiner panic. Eiko sighed once again. Suddenly Monkey-man… -Cough- I mean Zidane jumped through the window.

"Do not fear MONKEY MAN IS HERE!"

"AHHHHH HE HAS A DAGGER!" Steiner screamed like a little girl. Zidane gulped and flew through the roof, how? I don't know… "Fear not your majesty he has gone. Thanks to me, STEINER!" Dagger gave Steiner his reward, A TEDDY BEAR! "Thankyou" Steiner blew his nose on Eiko's gown.

"Ewwwwww, ANYWAY! GARNET can I enter the fashion show?" Eiko Begged after being grossed out by the captain of the knights of Pluto. Dagger took a moment to think about this.

"Why would a lovable Fire-Breathing bunny rabbit want to enter the Fashion show…" Dagger asked finding no answer she took a moment more of thought. "Steiner…"

"Yes my luggage!" Steiner saluted. Eiko wacked her forehead.

"Its liege STUPID!" Eiko corrected even though nobody was listening to her Dagger continued.

"Steiner, what is a fashion show?"

"Its when Woman compete in a show with a nice sense of style, then they win, on who is the hottest." Steiner explained.

"Wow." Dagger looked Surprised "Stiner that was a smart reply, have you been doing your homework?" Eiko Spotted the Fashion show leaflet before Steiner hid it behind his back.

"Yup." He replied "Do I get another teddy?" Steiner asked.

"Whats a teddy?" Dagger asked. Steiner then burst out into tears and ran to his bedroom. Dagger then went to the throne room by walking on the walls, THE MATRIX STYLE! Eiko was left all alone like she had been for ages.

-MEANWHILE IN THE KITCHEN!

"Just a wittle bit." Vivi asked it.

"Do not be absolutely un-intelligent Vivi, my comrade, This Caffeine filled cup of steamy hot Coffee is for those of high authority at the Supper party after the show, in the dining room." Quina answered (A/N I know it scares me too) in her british accent.

"But…" Vivi protested.

"Vivi, please wait in the corridor with the others and I shall bring out to you all oysters and caviar." Quina responded shoving Vivi out of the room and straight into Freya. Quina closed the door to the kitchen and left Vivi and Freya Staring at each other.

"So…" Vivi Asked after 15 minutes of silence "Getting a valentine from Frately?" Vivi tried to make conversation but Freay continued to stare wide eyed at Vivi with no expression on her face.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH GLUP GLUP!" Freya Replied. Vivi Walked backwards slowly with Freya still staring wide eyed at him. When Vivi Felt the wall make contact with his back he decided to run for it and ran into the nearest room he could find. Vivi wiped his forehead before looking up at the most horrible sight of all.

"Mr- Mr pinky by by?" Vivi asked shocked at the sight.

"Oh Vivi darling do you think this Pink Fairy costume makes my Butt look big." Amarant replied looking in a mirror and seeing the small mages reflection.

"I told you Amy, It doesn't I got it from Pink fluffies 4 u, and your butt looks tasty." Kuja proclaimed licking his lips. Amarant hit Kuja with a towel and giggled. They then had a pillow fight and Vivi ran out screaming.

-BACK WITH BEATRIX!

"Zidane! It is good you iz ere brudda!" Beatrix said banging her right shoulder to Zidane's left. "I has got a job 4 u in it!" Zidane looked at her while combing all of the ceiling pieces out of his hair. "Zid my man I want ya to judge this ere contest!"

"THAT'S FINE BY ME! FOR I AM MONKEY MAN!" Zidane punched his fist in the air. Beatrix gasped.

"You iz Monkey Man?"

"Umm no" He gulped looking at all of the faces looking at him. "But it would be cool if I was, he is my friend you know."

"HE IZ? Zid could u ask monkey man to judge the contest den in it?" Zidane smirked.

"Why of coarse Stein-Trix!"

-LATER ON THAT DAY AT THAT DAY AT THE CONTEST!

"Vivi My super-licious Sidekick how are you?" Zidane, now monkey man asked his friend. Vivi was still shocked and shivering from what he had seen earlier.

"I NEED COFFEE! I NEED CAFFEINE!" Vivi screamed.

"Have a break! Have a kit kat!" Zidane chuckled passing Vivi a chocolate bar. Vivi through it on the floor.

"I NEED COFFEE!" Suddenly the author appears.

"Here ya go Vivs!" The author A.K.A Emzies throws Vivi a Pepsi "Lots of caffeine in it." Emzies winked before spotting blank and smirking. "Now if you excuse me its valentines Day." She then ran away while Vivi grinned and Drank the whole bottle of Pepsi in one go.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! OUR HOSTS FOR THIS EVEING IS THE AUTHOR'S FRIEND, ANGEL!" The audience clapped while a young girl walked out onto the stage, she had long silver hair with two blue streaks in the front, Red eyes and was wearing black clothes and had a silver tail.

"Ummmm Hello, Our first contestant is ummm…" The girl started shaking "Our first contestant is… FREYA!" Freya walked out onto the stage in a Red bikini and no hat. Every clapped.

"Ummm Freya care to tell us a bit about yourself?" Angel asked feeling a little more confident. Freya didn't say anything. "F-F-Freya?" Freya took her gaze off the audience and rested on Angel.

"The lepricorn doesn't like you!" Freya yelled spastically going into a fir on the stage floor. The audience gasped except for Frately who was clapping.

"RESPECT TO IRELAND!" Frately screamed. Steiner ran out of the audience grabbed Freya and dragged her into Back stage.

"Okay.. Our Next contestant is the lovely and beautiful DAGGER!" Angel now even more confident screamed as Dagger walked out on to the stage as a tramp. Everyone looked at her strange. "Dagger?"

"No! People of Alexandria it is i! THE REAL PRINCESS GARNET!" The audience laughed and chucked the girl out of Alexandria.

"Okay now Dagger, come out!" Angel screamed before the men back stage through a real dagger on to the stage. "For Censored SAKE! Bring out QUEEN GARNET!" Suddenly they through a garnet stone with a mini crown on the top on stage. "WILL YOU GET IT RIGHT FOR ONCE PLEASE?" Finally Dagger walked out on the stage in a straight jacket.

"PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!" Zidane suddenly jumped out of the judge box and cut open Dagger's straight jacket. "Thank you Monkey man…" She sighed before noticing all the girls cover their eyes and all the men drooling. "What?" Dagger looked down noticing she had nothing on under the straight jacket. Dagger gasped and ran of stage. Zidane smirking Climbed back up into the judge box.

"OKAY!" Angel screamed who was now annoyed "Our next contestant is all the way from Earth and The author is just doing this for a laugh, and says that she is in most of her stories, Please Welcome MAT!" Mat was pushed on stage; she was wearing a pink fluffy crop top, pink fluffy boots and a pink frilly skirt. Mat's eyes were twitching.

"EMZIES IM GONNA KILL YOU!" She screamed at the girl rolling around on the floor in tears. Mat ran after her with her gun blade which had been painted Pink.

"Anyway…" Angel continued "Our next contestant is… MR SNUGGLES?" Angel looked confused. A bear then made its way on stage, well by being carried by a guard. The whole audience cried in applause, especially Steiner. "WHAT? That's it get the bear off and bring our the next contestant!" Angel screamed very VERY annoyed. "Our next contestant is none other than our general, BEATRIX!" Beatrix came out in what she usually wears, a back to front Cap, a pair of jeans, a pair of Nike trainers, a GAP Hood and shades covering her eyes. "Beatrix your supposed to be wearing something more fashionable." Angle sighed at the general.

"'as u got a porblemo of wot I iz wearin' brudda…" Beatrix shouted in Angels face which made her very Angry. Angel's eye started to twitch. "I mean sista…" Angel was still angry at the general. "That's it Angel u iz no longer in da Hood." Beatrix turned her cap and pulled her hood over it before walking back stage.

"NEXT CONTESTANT!... EIKO!" Eiko walked out towards the stage in a red dress and using tissue to fill it in. Angel slapped her forehead. Everyone looked at Eiko strangely. "OKAY Eiko tell us a bit about yourself." Eiko snatched the mike off of Angel and ran to the front of the stage.

"HELLO ALEXANDRIA! MY NAME IS EIKO CAROL! I AM WHATEVER AGE YOU WANT ME TO BE!" Eiko winked "I love Horses, Flowers and ZIDANE TRIBAL! I am only 2 gil a night" Eiko winked again. Angel then dragged Eiko of off stage.

"ANYWAY! Our last contestant is none other then … AMY? Who the hell is Amy?" Suddenly Amarant Walked onto the stage. "YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!"

"Look Vivi its Mr pinkie by by!" Zidane said to Vivi who was know stoned from having too many Pepsis, How you ask, I have no idea…

"Give me that mike Darling." Amarant said taking the mike off of Angel.

"GO AMY BABY YOU CAN DO IT! SHOW YOUR STUFF!" Kuja called from the audience.

"Thank you hunny bunny! Well I am Amy! I love to spend my time "£" and "£££" Amarant explained making everyone gag.

"Mr T Pities the fool' who just heard him speak!" Mr T explained running out of the arena. Angel Started to scream and ran dragging a beaten up Emzies away from Blank and Mat away from the special crazy corner.

"AND THE WINNER IS!" Zidane screamed "ME! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" Vivi whacked Zidane over the head…"

"REVIEW TO FIND OUT THE WINNER!" Vivi screamed making everyone Confused.

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**Emzies:** You heard the man….. or boy….. or whatever Vivi is…..


	3. EASTER!

Random Events chapter 3!

Emzies: Yada yada yada ON WITH THE FIC!

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Easter is a spawn of satan!

"My queen?"

"Send all the guards and make sure they don't come through!"

"But Your maj…"

"NOW!"

"At once My liege!" The soldier quickly responded with a salute and headed down the stairs. Dagger sighed and looked back out to her kingdom.

"What am I going to do… This is terrible!" Dagger felt like crying but held back the tears "No I have to be strong for my Kingdom!"

"Dagger…" Zidane Jumped through the window.

"Zidane please tell me the people are safe!" Dagger pleaded. Zidane walked over to her and hugged her.

"We are trying our best Dagger… we are trying our best." Zidane Comforted her stroking her hair. "Don't worry They will NOT reach this far." Steiner then burst through the door … crying.

"Please your highness STOP this!"

"NEVER!" Dagger cried Standing beside her window and looking once again outside to the chaos. "She won the beauty contest Because of this idiot" Zidane starched his head and dagger continued "She will not win my country as well!"

"But your majesty! Her and her bunny friends are only delivering chocolate to the little kids."

"CHOCOLATE!" Zidane and Dagger screamed in Unison. Steiner blinked

"Yes it is Easter…" Zidane and Dagger smirked and looked at each other.

"Meeting down in the hall. Get the other five world heros now!" Dagger ordered Steiner before running down the stairs with Steiner and Zidane on her tail.

XxXxXxXxX

"Well I say what is going on her dear?" Quina asked sipping her good English tea with her pinkie pointed out wards.

('.')

"Ahhhh!" Vivi Screamed pointing at this piece of paper.

"Whats the matter V?" Eiko Asked her friend.

"B-b-b-b-BUNNY!" Vivi Screamed.

('.')

"AHHHH!" Dagger screamed this time going into a panic attack and running around screaming with her hands up in the air.

"THEY WILL HAVE CHOCOLATE!" Eiko shouted unfortunally nobody heard. Dagger was screaming and running into random walls, Zidane who thought that pretending to BE like the bunnies would get him off the hook, was jumping about after he had twisted his tail into a bun, Vivi was offering the bunnies everything he ha but they refused and wanted the coffee but vivi refused, Amarant was dancing with one of the bunnies, Kuja was putting make-up on one of them, Quina was running with an umbrella (S) away from the bunnies who were chasing her, Steiner was being chased by bunnies, Beatrix was being chased by bunnies, Freya WAS chasing the bunnies and there was Eiko, Probally the only sane one. Eiko sighed and sat down. This was gonna be a long day. And then the bunnies had a plan.

"Use the ultimate weapon!" The leader bunny shouted. Then a ninja bunny came out of nowhere with what looked like a bazooka. Beatrix gulped.

"Steiner I just wanna say brudda that I luv ya man, ur ma bitch!" Steiner wiped away a tear.

"That was B.E.A.Utiful Beatrix."

"On one…" The ninja bunny said in a heavy Russian accent "On two" He carried on while the world heros plus Beatrix and kuja squeezed their eyes shut "And Da Three!" He got his finger ready "KABOOM!"

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Emzies: Oh hello!

Mat: EMZIES GET BACK TO THE STORY!

Emzies: Hold on! This will be quick! IT'S A ANNOYING COMMERCIAL! WATCH!

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Artemecian: Finding trousers that will fit you when you have a tail, 150 gil

Zidane: Ouch! What is this? It don't fit…

Shopkeeper: That would be Spandex sir…

Artemecian: the amount of rust remover needed for Sir Alberate Steiner… 102983 gil

Pluto Knight: It isn't working sir –Scrubbing Rust remover-

Steiner: HARDER SOLDIER HARDER AND FASTER! THAT'S RIGHT YES!

Maid outside: -To another maid- I never knew Sir Steiner Swung that way…

Artemecian: Going to the crystal world and barbequeing Necron

Vivi: -Burp-

Artemecian: … Priceless, Theres some thing money can't buy for everything else theres Tetramaster card XD

Oooooooooooooooooooooo

Emzies: O.o Okay…

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Hasta la vista baby!" And then a hundred ….. uhh baby chickens flew out of the bazookas and blew all of the heros far FAR away!

Far Far away

A harmless grasshopper was hopping along when bang the toad ate it mwahahahahahahahaha Splat

"Eurgh What did I just land on?" Zidane cried standing up to find Green Goo all over his trousers and tail. Zidane just shrugged and decided to go to the lake nearby for a bath.

The others

All of the rest landed in the land of chocolate.

"Heeheehee Dagger" exclaimed looking upon the chocolate hill. She wiped away a tear "Ish beautiful" Dagger sniffed.

"MWAHAHAHA EARTHLINGS HAVE LANDED HERE!" a bunny exclaimed "TAKE THEM TO 'HIM'!" The rabbit continued resulting in many armed bunnies dragging the 9 away to a big castle.

"B-b-beatrix, Im scared who exactly is 'HIM'" Steiner asked wimpering.

"He cud be da gangsta leader of easter init Bro'" Beatrix explained making Steiner gulp.

"I'm you … Brother?" He worriedly questioned before spitting and wiping his mouth. Quina sighed.

"Well I say chappo, The young lady is TRYING to explain that We are being Delivered quite urgently to the Rabbit's leader which would be of coarse be who you call the 'Easter Bunny'" It told him. Everyone was still confused. "This will be a jolly good show if I don't say." Quina admitted looking excited.

With Zidane

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Zidane shreaked. There around him where loads and loads of Girls, Not just Girls but Zidane Fan Girls. The bad thing was that Zidane was naked in the lake.

"ITS ZIDANE!" One of them screamed.

"YOUR ANGEL!" Zidane concluded pointing at the woman who was at the Fashoin show contest. Then all of the girls jumped in the water and was chasing Zidane.

"HEELLLPPPP MEEEEEE!" He screamed for help. One very fast girl was catching up on him, she had brown hair and pink eyes.

"ZIDDY WIDDY COME BACK!" Another shouted who had Blue hair and Green eyes.

"Shut up Aiko HES MINE!" The pink eyed girl exclaimed.

"Not if I get him first Holly!" Aiko Screeched back. Zidane was still running. He ran as fast as he could and then looked back to see all of the girls having cat fights… over him. Zidane had a sweat drop over his head and then got out of the lake got dressed and decided to find the others.

The others

"ITS 'HIM'!" Dagger shouted looking at the blonde on the chair. Everyone else looked at Dagger strangely. "I got bored so I decided to play my Play station 2! Okay?" She screamed spitting on Eiko's face in the process.

"SILENCE!" He screamed standing up.

"Umm Is that A boy or a girl?" Vivi whispered to Eiko or just shook her head.

"I don't know." Eiko answered.

"It's a boy." Dagger started to Explain. "He is in Final Fantasy X and his name is Tidus." All of the bunnies gasped and Tidus fell back on his chair in shock. The bunnies then started to whisper to each other.

"She said the Name, How did she do that?" The kept whispering. Tidus' reaction however was a bit different.

"Is he cryinig?" Steiner asked the group.

"I HATE YOU DAD!" He shouted.

"Well That's a bit Random." Kuja proclaimed. Freya was outraged, she, SHE was the random one! Freya then screamed like a pterodactyl (the know that Dinosaur). No one payed attention. Amarant was joining in the crying.

"PLEASE COME SAVE US MONKEY MAN!" Amarant shouted like a damsel in Distress.

"MONKEY MAN IS ZIDANE DUMB ASS!" Eiko Screamed at him.

"DO NOT LIE!" Kuja shouted back like a spastic. Tidus and The bunnies however were getting very scared by their attitude. So they ran, they ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran some more and ran a hell of a lot more. Then Zidane burst in the doors, dressed as none other than monkey man.

"MONKEY MAN! I KNEW YOU WOULD SAVE US!" Amarant sighed in relief.

"Come on Zidane brudda get us out." Beatrix pleaded. Monkey man just blinked.

"Who is this Zidane you speak of?" He asked them.

"Okay Zidane joke is over!" Vivi laughed "Now get us out."

"I really do not know who you were talking about, but I will save you!" He cut the ropes and stepped back. "Now that you are saved, my work is done, GOOD BYE!" He shouted and jumped out the window and flew away. Everyone rushed towards the window and watched him fly.

"I never knew Zidane could Do that?" Eiko gazed in amazment.

"Never knew I could do what?" Zidane asked standing behind them. Everyone jumped back and looked at Zidane then out the window to monkey man….. it was strange…

Anyway what happened.

THEY GOT THE CHOCOLATE! BECAUSE THE BUNNIES AND TIDUS FLEED THE CHOCOLATE WAS ALL THEIRS AND THEY ALL ATE IT. The bad Thing was they all became constipated…. And that ends our … err… wonderful…. Easter Sunday :p

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Meanwhile

The valentine beauty show winner was being spolied with Chocolates. Her name? Wel THE WINNER OF THE VALENTINE BEAUTY CONTEST WAS... dun dun duuuuuuuuuun ... MR SNUGGLES:p

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Emzies: Yes…. PLEASE REVIEW!  
Mog: And we are very happy by the reviews we have had so far :D Mat: THANK YOU! Emzies: And if you like me you will go to my website www.Emziesdench. and sign the guest book :D thank you! 


	4. authors note

**AUTHORS NOTE!**

Hey guys! I know I know, I'm such a bad person! It has been just under a year since I last updated this ; If you notice the second chapter is valentines day last year and it is already coming up to This valentines day. However do NOT fear! I am updating the next chapter "MAY DAY" ON May day of coarse :p.

These are the chapters that will ALL be released THIS year.

May May Day,

June Zidane's Birthday,

July SUMMER,

October Halloween,

November Bombfire night,

And that's it :( Then the stories are over. If I am not to busy I might do some EXTRA chapters afterwards. (Boxing day, New year, St patricks day… blah blah blah )

Thanks and sorry to the faithful reviewers who have missed a year of this :( I'm sorry

XxX Love Emzies XxX


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